It’s funny how some of the moments that have impacted us the most as photographers come from the most unexpected places or at the most unpredictable times. Sometimes we don’t even realize their influence until much much later. For me, that mother of the groom at that wedding all those years ago was one of those moments.

My husband Chris and I were shooting her son’s wedding and at one point during the day she pulled us aside. At this point my mind was racing thinking about what was so important she felt like she had to tell us then and there. She proceeded to say that she wanted to personally tell us how much she loved her son and new daughter in law’s engagement photos from their engagement session a few months prior. She thought they were just beautiful. And then, it came. What she said next changed everything. She said, “I loved the photos because they were just SO THEM.” She didn’t mention the beautiful light or gorgeous scenery. She didn’t compliment us on the flattering poses, the exposure or anything like that.

The “So Them” Factor

Weeks went by and what she said still stuck with me. It was one of the most amazing compliments I felt like I could receive as a photographer. I wanted all of my couples and their families to look at their own photos and feel the same way she did about her son’s. I wanted to truly capture what I have come to call the “So Them Factor.”

The “So Them Factor” is the story, details, and personality that makes an individual and couple unique and therefore special. I wanted to capture the way Ava scrunched her nose when she was genuinely laughing so hard at her fiancé Steve’s jokes – something she has always done since she was a little girl. Her grandma does the same thing. I wanted to capture how Haley would randomly kiss Gavin’s hand as they walked together hand in hand – something she started doing when he was really sick a few years ago. For them it was a way of saying “I love you” with no words. I wanted to capture how big Emily and Brad’s smiles were as they squeezed one another hands back and forth as they sat next to one another – something they had done on their first date and continued to do throughout the years. I couldn’t have thought up direction or poses to elicit these authentic responses. But by knowing a couple and not giving too much direction, I gave them the space to be authentically themselves.

Authenticity versus Over Posing

What has helped me in capturing my couple’s uniqueness and chemistry – their “So Them Factor” – has been truly getting to know my couples. And not just getting to know how they met and hearing about the proposal. But by spending quality time with them and really observing and listening to their story; who they are and what makes them special as individuals and together as a couple. What they have been through, what they have overcome, their victories and imperfections and at the end of the day what makes them THEM. I then use this insight as I am photographing. So instead of telling a couple, for example, to face one another with hands on one another’s waists, his hands lower than her's and for her to turn her head 90 degrees and then both of them laugh really hard, I could tell them to hold one another tight and think about the time when he called her phone and was gushing about how much he loved her only to realize her grandma had answered her phone. Instant genuine laughs as they recall this memory. Conversation between the two. Authentic smiles.

As another example, maybe I see a golden retriever during their shoot and we all start recalling the story they told me during their consultation about how she tripped over a stranger’s dog leash in NYC and the person that helped her up was him. That’s how they met and their story began. These are all things that make them unique and special. They are all part of their story that is theirs and theirs alone.

I have found that for me, giving my couples too much technical or impersonal direction during a shoot and over posing them drains the uniqueness of a couple. It no longer matters who the couple is but becomes all about the pose. But when I really know the couple and they feel comfortable, I can give them permission to be themselves … permission to relax, have fun, and celebrate their story. I can capture them with no walls up. They have genuine laughs, hold hands the way they naturally would and occasionally position themselves with one another with minimal direction from me. They aren’t over thinking how they should stand or look or breathe. They are being authentically themselves in the moment, and THIS is what I want to capture. Because as the end of the day, when they look at their photos, I want them to say “these photos are beautiful and so US.”

Younes Bounhar and Amanda Large of Double Space Photography are architectural photographers based in Ottawa, Canada. In a short span of time, since they launched only a couple of years ago, they have photographed for a great many clients in Canada and beyond. It's rather easy to see how and why.

I knew nothing about architectural photographers or architectural photography. I recall a time when I was asked to photograph the interior of a home for sale and I remember sweating bullets. When Younes and I connected on Twitter, now several years back, I knew I wanted to interview him for Tiffinbox at some point because I was intrigued about what he does for his clients. But his busy schedule (he and his wife Amanda are on the go all the time) prevented us from nailing a specific date down. During a few recent exchanges on Twitter, I asked him again if he could commit to a date and this time he said he had a window of about a week when he could sit down and talk about architectural photography, working with his wife, Amanda, and traveling the world.

So here is that chat with Younes. Give it a listen, and check out the images he and Amanda have produced for architect clients around the globe.

Like architectural photographers Younes and Amanda, are you passionate about photographing just one subject and knocking it out of the park? What genre of photography is it? Sound off below!

If you have been an avid reader of Tiffinbox, you've read David Jackson‘s popular guest posts.

If you haven't, here is the first one and here is the second one.

Dave is an award-winning advertising, commercial and entertainment photographer based in Appleton, Wisconsin. He and his crew are known to make graphically intense portraits for bands and businesses. He has the ability to sculpt light and create images that pop. Take a look at some of these images!

I first learned about Dave through Zack Arias. It's true, long before I became a friend, I was a fan. I watched and read Dave's whimsical blog posts and loved how his personality came through in every single one of them. He is definitely not afraid to show his clients who he truly is. Lean and tall, with a glowing beard and tattoos, he has an august presence about him. When you get to talking to him, you immediately see how humble, generous and really gentle this guy is.

In the last two years, I have flown out to Appleton, Wisconsin twice, to learn from Dave. I discovered through the course of his workshops that just observing wouldn't cut it. He expected me to play and learn and make mistakes and ask why. We listened to Dave for a bit as he showed a few lighting scenarios and explained how he approached a specific project. Then it was up to us to roll up our sleeves and work.

Dave is clear that the intent of his workshops aren't to leave with a set of “portfolio” images but feel really comfortable taking those first steps towards creating your own back at home. Both the workshops ran long, only because Dave wanted to be sure that all of the attendee questions were answered and that he had truly helped everyone out.

I can tell you that my lighting has improved dramatically since signing up with Dave. Please be sure that he didn't pay me to say that. Take a look at my work and follow me on Facebook where you will see my personal experiments with lighting.

As a busy studio that's nabbing all kinds of awards for their work, it's awfully difficult to get Dave and company to teach a workshop outside of Wisconsin. As I said above, I had to fly to Appleton, Wisconsin! In rare form, Dave is coming to teach at Inspire Photo Seminars in February.

Since he is going to be in Sturbridge, Massachusetts already, he figured he would give those photographers in the New England area a chance to sign up for his workshops closer to their homes – Breaking the Rules Workshop and F/What? Workshop.

You'll notice there is an option to register for both days and save a bundle. If you are new to off-camera flash lighting, you may want to consider the one-two-punch. However, if you are comfortable with your f/stops, shutter speeds and ISO's, then skip the first one and sign up for just the second. Either way, I know you are going to come away learning something new that you will use on a daily basis in your photography business.

So, register here and now. [There is a good chance I will be assisting Dave during his workshops in Sturbridge, MA, so if you do register, please say hello!]

Brent Robertson is a partner at Fathom, a progressive agency based in Hartford that helps companies recognize their culture and realize their dreams.

I had an opportunity to speak with him about how values, when tied to our work, can propel us in business.

I referenced Brent's blog, Possibility of Possibility and two of his blog posts. Here they are:

Live Your Value At Work – part 1 and Live Your Values At Work – part 2

This is the first of many such conversations I hope to have with business leaders about the meaning of work and working in the creative arts. If you would like to suggest or nominate other business leaders you would like to hear from – inside and particularly outside the photography industry – please pen your thoughts below.

Lastly, tell me: Are you pursuing photography by infusing your values into your work? How do your values shape what you do with a camera? Are you defined by your tools? Comment below!

It's perhaps one of the few times in the year when I think living in Connecticut is cool. No, really, when the Mystic Seminars are announced by Walter van Dusen, its founder, I get quite giddy. As I have mentioned in the past here and here, there are a ton of reasons you should go to this photography conference.

This year, like the last few years at Mystic Seminars, the speakers set to present are from around the world. This probably makes Mystic Seminars the only regional conference that is international in scope.

So, you are probably wondering why it's important to hear from photographers outside of the US. The simple answer is to glean a different perspective. Right around this time of the year when business grinds to a halt for some, it's easy to get stuck in the way you did things back in 2013. I've been there and done that too.

What's great about the timing of the Mystic Seminars is it's the first thing you get to do when things are slow that jolt you back into action. And, hearing from photographers who live far away from you can be just the thing your creative brain is looking for in January.

So, I highly recommend Mystic Seminars.

The early-bird discount is already in effect now though December 23rd, and you get the 3-day conference for $469. I just spoke with Walter and he is offering a special discount code (TIFFINBOX) where you can get an additional $25 off. Apparently no other discount codes exist, so thank you Walter! I hope to see some of you there.

If you do decide to go and you use the code above, would you please come back here and let me know? I don't get paid to promote the conference. I just think it is incredible value for photographers.

The first 10 of you to send me your receipt (showing me your mailing address and that you have paid for the conference) will receive Gary Vaynerchuk's new book, Jab, Jab, Jab, Right Hook: How To Tell Your Story In A Noisy, Social World. Receipts may be emailed to me here – seshu AT tiffinbox dot org. There will be other goodies mailed to you as well, but you'll have to wait and see what those are.